It only seems fitting that I decided to write this post on the very day that I began this blog 2 years ago. This was not planned.(Maybe some synchronicity??) I guess this is just the right time to share my story. What I have on my mind tonight is Endings. Are endings just new beginnings, a new chapter in the story of life? It really depends on what is ending. The ending I am currently speaking about is the end of my almost 2 year relationship with Jason. Some reading this will be finding out this way and to you I apologize. *sigh* I am not sure I am ready to talk about this but I know I need to for the healing process and now is as good a time as any. Although I am extremely sad and heartbroken, this is the most adult, mature, non drama break up I have ever been through. Its kinda weird really because I have never experienced this before. The breakup was not mutual on my part but it had nothing to do with anything negative. It doesn't make the hurt any less, just different. The main culprit in this was distance. Being in a long distance relationship is extremely challenging and it doesn't offer up the time to work on differences as when you are with someone on a more consistent basis **insert tears here** I know I will be ok. I know at the end of all this we will remain friends, but all that doesn't make the pain any less. I have my good moments and my bad moments but there are more good ones then bad ones. I learned a lot about myself from my relationship with him so I am trying to concentrate on those good aspects. I am trying not to let all the negative thoughts creep in because I know that I did NOTHING wrong. Its tough to reframe negative thoughts but I teach my clients to do it all the time so I know that I know how to. I tell them its a process and takes time and I have to continue to remind myself of the same thing. Just like healing from heartbreak is a process. Its not a fun one that is for sure. . . I can't write anymore right now. I will be back though because I forgot how much I really enjoy blogging. I know this will be one of many creative outlets that will help me through this along with the amazing support system I have. Thank you to all those that have already been there for me and to all those who will in the future. **hugs**
Had a feeling that was what was going on with you these past few weeks.....I think it is ironic that you offer *hugs* to your readers in true Amanda fashion. Of course we are all here for you and there are definitely more lessons to learn from this in the good sense. But, my heart still breaks for you because I know how happy you were when you were with him:(
ReplyDeleteI know a ton of Heathers, ok only like 4, but still . . . Thank you to whichever Heather this is. Your support means a lot to me.
ReplyDeleteIt's me!! You know, Heather!! Lol. There, how's that...? I added my picture. I have about 3 blogs in various places and forgot this one has no identity. And you know you always have my support. As a matter of fact, I think there might be a coffee/lunch date that you still owe me which has MY support written all over it;) All you have to do is collect. Love ya, girl!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I sent you an invite to my blog. It is not my oldest one, and has only a few entries, but at least you won't feel like I am lurker.
ReplyDeleteI have accepted to follow your blog and you are correct a date is in order. Will most likely have to be on a weekend . . . new management . . . will explain ALL about it on our date! Will text you to make set plans.
ReplyDeleteThank you for always supporting me no matter what. I have never forgotten all the support and encouragement you gave me when we were both still in case management. It means a lot and you mean a lot to me and I am glad you remain in my life. Love yoU!!